kippurbird | Lip locking and liver lunching.

Chapter Seven pt. 1

Again we begin with Thea kissing Anita. "I let my body melt into hers, let her feed at my mouth". This reminds me of a mother bird up-chucking dinner for her chicks. Like in March of the Penguins. The word "kissed" is used seven times in the first paragraph. Three times in one sentence. \~/. Anita tastes Thea's power by licking some sort of white film off her lips. Isn't foaming at the mouth usually a sign of rabies? And wouldn't licking it be a bad thing? I think it's supposed to be sexy though."I licked her lip, and found that there was a whitish film on the fullness of her mouth" But I just get this imagine of Thea drooling like a dog. \~/

Doing this causes everyone to react. Actually only the merpeople. I have to type this in so you can see what I mean.

I heard the ocean whispering against the shore. I could hear it like music. I looked around the room. I wanted to ask someone else if they could hear it. I meant to look for Micah, or Nathaniel, but that wasn't who caught my gaze. Thomas was staring at me with wide eager eyes. His brother had collapsed on the love seat and was covering his ears with his hands, rocking back and forth. Cristos was fighting it, whatever it was, but Thomas wasn't. Sampson had a death grip on the love seat, but his eyes had drowned to black so that he looked blind. The other man and woman that they'd brought with them turned black eyes on me. The woman was hugging herself, as if cold, or afraid. The man had a death grip on his own wrist, the typical jock pose turned into something harsh and struggling, as if, if he let go of his wrist, would do something unfortunate. Last I found Samuel's eyes. His eyes had bled to vampire fire, the glowing brown with flecks of green flame in their depths. They could all hear it, that whisper, seductive sound. The ocean was calling, and I didn't know how to answer it.

It's like she's... well, I don't know exactly how to put it. Hamilton is trying to get absolutely ever person possible to be interested in Anita. The paragraph feels like everyone wants to jump her but they're trying to control themselves. Which means we just missed out on an orgy. Of course this may be a good thing. I'm not sure. I think the woman is looking frightened because orgy with a woman involved is a bad thing. Or something. \~/

Then there's the bit with the vampire eyes. I'm sorry, the vampire fire. I stopped describing things like that about ten years ago. Beyond that it's another image that doesn't really make much sense. \~/ While I'm at it, if this thing is supposed to be only effecting mermaids, why is it effecting Samuel, who is a vampire? \~/

Thea passes Anita off to Thomas and they start trying to go at it. Exhibitionists aren't they? Before it can really get, for lack of a better term, good Thomas encounters the gun in the small of Anita's back. Which confuses Thomas and he stops. Anita also has a knife as long as her forearm on her back which makes me wonder how she bends over without it ruining her shirt or how she reaches it. \~/\~/ Anita is shaken out of the lust by this and realizes that Thomas is very young because he doesn't have worldly experience like she does and she wouldn't want to drag him down into her dark and desperate world.

There's a weird sort of sentence that follows this, "The black was beginning to drain away, showing the hazel of his human eyes. He was the son of a master vampire and a siren..." Vampires and siren's aren't human but she uses the term human eyes. I know why and things like that, it was just an odd conjunction. \~/

Anita wants to greet Auggie (remember him)'s people next to be fair which pisses off Thea because Anita hasn't kissed her other two sons. As she says, "They are only his henchmen and his mistress. We have brought you our flesh and blood, the fruit of our lives." Which you're pimping out to a complete and total stranger to see if they have enough power to become a siren. Personally I don't see the difference between the two, except for the fact that at least Auggie isn't demeaning his family by doing that to his kids (if he has any). \~/\~/\~/\~/

There's some bitch-snipping and we get to meet Auggie's people. Before I get to that, Hamilton seems to have trouble getting the difference between "yay" and "yea". She uses "yea" instead of "yay" \~/.

Right. Auggies' party. Auggie has a girlfriend/mistress who is a paragraph long of description including the fact that she's wearing a dress that is so short that you can tell she's not wearing anything else underneath it. Anita comments this with an "Oh my". Pot, Kettle anyone? \~/Sorry, it's two paragraphs of description to indicate that she's had "work done". The mistress's name is Bunny.

No. I'm not shitting you.

Bunny.

What makes this really bad is that I know this woman who is called "Bunny" and she's a sort of dowdy motherly woman and nothing at all like this Bunny. The images are interesting. \~/

Bunny bitches at Anita saying, "At least I'm whoring for one man, not a dozen". Of course, since she is the voice of reason, she immediately gets tossed out. \~/ And is getting sent back to Chicago.

Auggie apologizes for her saying that she's jealous. Of what? As Auggie puts it:

"You are a natural beauty," Auggie said. "Artifice gave Bunny her face, her figure, most of her best figures were found under a surgeon's blade. In you walk, all natural equipment, wearing more clothes, and still getting more attention from the men in the room than she did. When you were with Thea and Thomas, every man in the room was riveted. We wanted you. Wanted to touch you in a way that is rare.

I did not realize wanting to fuck her senseless was touching her in a way that was rare. \~/

But really is everyone so shal... wait, let me restate that. Everyone is so shallow here that it's obvious that the reason why Bunny is disliking of Anita because she's "better looking" than her as opposed to, perhaps, Anita supposedly being better than her even if she's a worse whore than her. \~/\~/\~/

... I think I will now call Anita Whornita. It has a nice ring to it, I think.

In any case, Anita is so humble that she does does not realize this is why Bunny was so upset. It being "She out vamped the sirens." \~/

Auggie's two offerings are were-lions. They're too dominant for her. Because she has to be on top all the time and dominant... or something. \~/ The two were-lions are Haven and Pierce. Auggie does something to the lions when he touches the back of their necks. It's just... something. \~/ For some reason the lions only having one name is of interest. As opposed to them just wanting to give one name. \~/

Whornita wants to know where Jean-Claude is and she gets a mental flash of him and Asher fighting Meng Ding. Whornita sends him a mental text message that Jean should get back up. And he's no. And she's well it's good management. I'm yawning over here.\~/

Then a really head banging part hits. Whornita asks one of the guards to send Jean some wererats and wants to know if she could telepathically contact the wererat guards. Said guard pulls out a CELL PHONE! Yes, dear pigeons, a CELL PHONE. The device that I had said would have saved so much trouble earlier, but then gave Hamilton the benefit of the doubt because the time line had not been given a year. But Claudia, the guard in question, has a cellphone. And she uses it. And it's obvious that others have one because she can talk to someone with another one.

So? WHY DOESN'T ANITA HAVE ONE?! I will tell you why. Because if she had a cell phone, Jean could have called her up.

Jean: Hey, Anita, I'm having a slight problem with Meng ding and I have Asher with me. Would you mind playing host?

Anita: Oh, I guess so, be careful and I hope to see you soon.

Jean: Kiss Kiss Mah Petite

Anita: Bye

Noooo... instead we got.

People: Long convoluted conversation about various people's sex lives that make young and the restless look prudish.

Yes, so the cellphone wasn't used for plot convenience. For infodumping. Why doesn't Whornita even have a cellphone? She seems to be the sort of person who would need one. After all she supposedly has a job that requires her to be on call 24/7 and a cellphone would make it so much easier to get those calls. In fact she doesn't even think it's strange that Claudia has a cell so obviously they're everyday things now. In fact it's a small cellphone which means that's even more recent. \~/\~/\~/\~/\~/\~/

Please... there are other ways to get information across than plot contrivance. Please, think about them and save my liver. I need my liver. Won't you think of the poor liver? It deserves your help. Please, help this liver out by thinking about what you're writing. Please, if not for me, for all the other livers who are getting ruined in this drinking game.

We need your help.

Drinks: 30

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Pt. 2 Anita blows up, next time on My Favorite Spork.