IT'S DONE!!
Oct. 31st, 2008 09:05 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kippurbirdThis has been a long and torturous bumpy ride. But now? Now it is over. My dear pigeons, I present to you Twilight's epilogue.
Epilogue:
Bella is all dressed up and doesn't know why. Edward is all dressed up as well. She doesn't have a clue why this could be. Instead, we get a meandering on how Edward looks.
First off, just in my writerly opinion a mocking smile is not the same as a grin. Mocking indicates that you're laughing at them. Grinning indicates that you're laughing with them. The fact that Edward is mocking her and that she never mocks back makes me feel like she's being laughed at for being such a fool. Also, notice the description of the clothes.
Alice played -in a remarkably cute phrase - Guinea Pig Barbie with Bella. Putting her in a frilly dress. Her reasoning for doing this? She reminded me that she didn't have any memories of being human, and asked me not to ruin her vicarious fun. Sooo... Alice couldn't play dress up with herself? She needs to be human to put make up on people? She doesn't put make up on or dress nicely since she got changed? She has no personal hygiene? What's worse, Bella actually believes her. I seriously fail to see what one has to do with the other.
To make things even more annoying, suddenly Edward has a cell phone. Remember, Carlisle had to hand them out when they were splitting up. Now, he has one just in his pocket and it's his cell phone instead of a cellphone. The second meaning that he's just borrowing it or he has it for an unusual circumstance. But as it belongs to him, it means that he owns it and it's a regular part of his make up. On his cell phone he receives a call from Charlie.
GASP you mean that Charlie actually thinks that someone Bella said she didn't like any more who then followed her out to Phoenix to expressively make her change her mind and then was involved in an accident that seriously inured her is bad for her?! You mean he's actually finally acting like a parent instead of a piece of cardboard!? SHOCK! SHOCK! SHOCK! Charlie showed some character! What is this book coming to!? Oh wait, it doesn't matter, we're at the end. I like the visiting hours. It makes it sound like Charlie is doing police supervision. Unfortunately, it's too little too late. And is thrown out the window in a few paragraphs.
See, Tyler has shown up at Charlie's house expecting to take Bella to the prom. This scene utterly baffles and angers me. Bella has been back for quite a while and Tyler would have had plenty of opportunities to confirm plans with her on when they're meeting up. And Bella had plenty of opportunities to, if he had asked, tell him no. The only purpose of this scene is so that Bella can realize that she's going to the prom... and Edward can continue his creepy stalker streak.
Edward has just said that she's not allowed to make decisions on what she wants to do at night. Why couldn't she be allowed to go out with Tyler, if only as a friend? Or Jessica. What he should have said is that he and Bella were dating which would indicate that Tyler's romantic intentions were unwelcome. His phrasing though indicates that anyone's attentions would be unwelcome. That only he has the right to be with her. This is utterly controlling, creepy and stalkery. As well as abusive. One of the signs of abuse is not letting the abusie do what she wants with people, controlling their every movement and friends. Not only that but Edward is unapologetic. He doesn't care that Tyler's evening is ruined. I know I'd be sorry if someone paid a lot of money for something and it didn't happen.
But here? Edward is obviously gloating about winning the Bella Prize. She's not a person but a thing to be one and trotted around like a prize horse.
Now Bella realizes that she's going to the Prom and is horrified. And she's been having vague suspicions all day and prom is no where near them. Edward is angry that she starts to cry. Why? Because Edward tricked her into going somewhere she'll feel humiliated at. He utterly dazzles her, He turned the full force of his scorching golden eyes on me and she once again becomes passive and allows him to do what he wants her to do.
All the Cullen kids are going to be there, even Rosalie. Edward says it prefacing it with an ellipse, as if he's reluctant to have her go. Why shouldn't she if her husband is going? The reason being? She still acts as if Bella doesn't exist. And if she doesn't act like Bella exists then she is in the wrong.
Remember how a few bits ago Bella says that Charlie didn't like Edward and felt like it was all his fault that Bella got hurt? Well apparently he was in on Edward taking her to the Prom. But wait! I thought Charlie didn't like Edward! Oh Noes Charlie's brief spot light of character has gone down the tubes for the sake of the Romangst. There should have been something of Tyler being preferred to Edward or anything. BUT... yeah. That would get in the way of the romance.
The Prom is being held at the school gym and for some reason Bella finds balloon arches and garlands of pastel crepe paper funny. Never having been to a prom I don't know why this would be considered funny or not. But, we see the other four Cullen kids dancing on the floor. They've completely taken it up because everyone is in awe of them.
My first thought when reading this? Is that Jasper and Emmett dancing together. And my mind went all OHH SLASHY!! And then... wait... that doesn't fit at all. Then we get to the girls. And as they're Speshul and Pretty they get the big description. Even longer than the location itself. Edward drags her on to the dance floor and dances with her by putting her feet on his.
Then Jacob shows up. Edward is Not Happy at seeing him. Especially since Jacob wants to talk. GASP someone Bella is friends with wants to talk to her! How HORRIBLE! Edward lets Jacob cut in giving Bella an intent look. It makes me feel like he's telling her that if she does or says anything he disproves of, she'll be in trouble.
Jacob shot up, before he was shorter than her, now he's taller than her. Minor detail, but I imagine it'll help for him being a potential love interest next book as you can't possible date someone shorter than you. Billy, Jacob's dad, wants him to deliver a message to Bella. Long and short of it Billy wants her to break up with Edward, (he didn't believe that Bella fell in Phoenix-at least someone has sense)and that to warn her that, "We'll be watching". Bella laughs it off as Billy meaning well. The dance ends. Edward cuts back in.
Edward is mad, not at Billy for saying those things, but at Jacob, for two reasons. One: He made Edward break his promise of not letting go of her all night. (Does that mean he'll go into the bathroom with her if she needs to wee?) and two: he called Bella pretty instead of beautiful. Um... right. Odd reasons to get irritated at a person. But I think it's mostly because Jacob showed an interest in Bella who is Edward's. He really needs to get her a dog collar for that.
Edward takes her outside, it's twilight. GASP SIGNIFICANCE saying "Twilight, again," he murmured. "Another ending. No matter how perfect the day is, it always has to end." He brought Bella to the Prom so that she could have a life experience. Bella says that it would only be a parallel dimension of her going to a prom. The reason why she went is because Edward took her. Bella wishes there was some way to explain to how very uninterested I was in a normal human life.
That is not healthy. She has completely given up her life just so that she can be with him. She will do anything to be with him. Again, I bring up that point that if Edward asked her to kill someone or he'll leave, she will kill them. This is not romantic. You are supposed to have interests outside of The Guy.
Finally Edward asks Bella what she thought was going to be happening because they were all dressed up. She thought he was going to turn her.
Yes. That's why they got all dressed up. So that he could inject her with a nasty venom that'll cause her great amounts of pain and kill her. Definitely a black tie event. Edward is at least reasonable about this, even if he does kill the twilight metaphor. So ready for this to be the end... for this to be the twilight of your life, though your life has barely started. You're ready to give up everything. Bella merely points out that it's not the ending it's a beginning.
She is suicidal. She has been throwing herself at a man who can kill her, threaten to kill her and is now begging for him to kill her. Sure, she'll come back as a vampire, but there's no way of knowing that she will. Well, we know she will because she's the heroine, but she doesn't. She just wants to die to be with him. This isn't romance, this is a tragedy.
She gives up for now as they both renew their vows of I Love you Forever.
The End.
*Does the happy dance*
Epilogue:
Bella is all dressed up and doesn't know why. Edward is all dressed up as well. She doesn't have a clue why this could be. Instead, we get a meandering on how Edward looks.
He threw a mocking smile in my direction, and my breath caught in my throat. Would I ever get used to his perfection?
"I did mention that you looked very nice, didn't I?" I verified.
"Yes." He grinned again. I'd never seen him dress in black before and, with the contrast against his pale skin his beauty was absolutely surreal. That much I couldn't deny, even if the fact that he was wearing a tuxedo made me very nervous.
First off, just in my writerly opinion a mocking smile is not the same as a grin. Mocking indicates that you're laughing at them. Grinning indicates that you're laughing with them. The fact that Edward is mocking her and that she never mocks back makes me feel like she's being laughed at for being such a fool. Also, notice the description of the clothes.
Alice played -in a remarkably cute phrase - Guinea Pig Barbie with Bella. Putting her in a frilly dress. Her reasoning for doing this? She reminded me that she didn't have any memories of being human, and asked me not to ruin her vicarious fun. Sooo... Alice couldn't play dress up with herself? She needs to be human to put make up on people? She doesn't put make up on or dress nicely since she got changed? She has no personal hygiene? What's worse, Bella actually believes her. I seriously fail to see what one has to do with the other.
To make things even more annoying, suddenly Edward has a cell phone. Remember, Carlisle had to hand them out when they were splitting up. Now, he has one just in his pocket and it's his cell phone instead of a cellphone. The second meaning that he's just borrowing it or he has it for an unusual circumstance. But as it belongs to him, it means that he owns it and it's a regular part of his make up. On his cell phone he receives a call from Charlie.
Charlie had been...difficult since my return to Forks. He had compartmentalized my bad experience into two defined reactions. Towards Carlisle he was almost worshipfully grateful. On the other hand, he was stubbornly convinced that Edward was at fault- because, if not for him, I wouldn't have left home in the first place. And Edward was far from disagreeing with him. These days I had rules that hadn't existed before: curfews... visiting hours.
GASP you mean that Charlie actually thinks that someone Bella said she didn't like any more who then followed her out to Phoenix to expressively make her change her mind and then was involved in an accident that seriously inured her is bad for her?! You mean he's actually finally acting like a parent instead of a piece of cardboard!? SHOCK! SHOCK! SHOCK! Charlie showed some character! What is this book coming to!? Oh wait, it doesn't matter, we're at the end. I like the visiting hours. It makes it sound like Charlie is doing police supervision. Unfortunately, it's too little too late. And is thrown out the window in a few paragraphs.
See, Tyler has shown up at Charlie's house expecting to take Bella to the prom. This scene utterly baffles and angers me. Bella has been back for quite a while and Tyler would have had plenty of opportunities to confirm plans with her on when they're meeting up. And Bella had plenty of opportunities to, if he had asked, tell him no. The only purpose of this scene is so that Bella can realize that she's going to the prom... and Edward can continue his creepy stalker streak.
I'm sorry if there's been some kind of miscommunication, but Bella is unavailable tonight." Edward's tone changed and the threat in his voice was suddenly much more evident as he continued. "To be perfectly honest, she'll be unavailable every night, as far as anyone besides myself is concerned . No offense. And I'm sorry about your evening." He didn't sound sorry at all. And then he snapped the phone shut, a huge smirk on his face.(bolding mine)
Edward has just said that she's not allowed to make decisions on what she wants to do at night. Why couldn't she be allowed to go out with Tyler, if only as a friend? Or Jessica. What he should have said is that he and Bella were dating which would indicate that Tyler's romantic intentions were unwelcome. His phrasing though indicates that anyone's attentions would be unwelcome. That only he has the right to be with her. This is utterly controlling, creepy and stalkery. As well as abusive. One of the signs of abuse is not letting the abusie do what she wants with people, controlling their every movement and friends. Not only that but Edward is unapologetic. He doesn't care that Tyler's evening is ruined. I know I'd be sorry if someone paid a lot of money for something and it didn't happen.
But here? Edward is obviously gloating about winning the Bella Prize. She's not a person but a thing to be one and trotted around like a prize horse.
Now Bella realizes that she's going to the Prom and is horrified. And she's been having vague suspicions all day and prom is no where near them. Edward is angry that she starts to cry. Why? Because Edward tricked her into going somewhere she'll feel humiliated at. He utterly dazzles her, He turned the full force of his scorching golden eyes on me and she once again becomes passive and allows him to do what he wants her to do.
All the Cullen kids are going to be there, even Rosalie. Edward says it prefacing it with an ellipse, as if he's reluctant to have her go. Why shouldn't she if her husband is going? The reason being? She still acts as if Bella doesn't exist. And if she doesn't act like Bella exists then she is in the wrong.
Remember how a few bits ago Bella says that Charlie didn't like Edward and felt like it was all his fault that Bella got hurt? Well apparently he was in on Edward taking her to the Prom. But wait! I thought Charlie didn't like Edward! Oh Noes Charlie's brief spot light of character has gone down the tubes for the sake of the Romangst. There should have been something of Tyler being preferred to Edward or anything. BUT... yeah. That would get in the way of the romance.
The Prom is being held at the school gym and for some reason Bella finds balloon arches and garlands of pastel crepe paper funny. Never having been to a prom I don't know why this would be considered funny or not. But, we see the other four Cullen kids dancing on the floor. They've completely taken it up because everyone is in awe of them.
I looked at the dance floor; a wide gap had formed in the center of the floor, where two couples whirled gracefully. The other dancers pressed to the sides of the room to give them space - no one wanted to stand in contrast with such radiance. Emmett and Jasper were intimidating and flawless in classic tuxedos. Alice was string in a black satin dress with geometric cutouts that bared large triangles of her snowy white skin. And Rosalie was... well, Rosalie. She was beyond belief. Her vivid scarlet dress was backless, tight to her calves where it flared into a wide ruffled train, with a neck like that plunged to her waist. I pitied every girl in the room, myself included.
My first thought when reading this? Is that Jasper and Emmett dancing together. And my mind went all OHH SLASHY!! And then... wait... that doesn't fit at all. Then we get to the girls. And as they're Speshul and Pretty they get the big description. Even longer than the location itself. Edward drags her on to the dance floor and dances with her by putting her feet on his.
Then Jacob shows up. Edward is Not Happy at seeing him. Especially since Jacob wants to talk. GASP someone Bella is friends with wants to talk to her! How HORRIBLE! Edward lets Jacob cut in giving Bella an intent look. It makes me feel like he's telling her that if she does or says anything he disproves of, she'll be in trouble.
Jacob shot up, before he was shorter than her, now he's taller than her. Minor detail, but I imagine it'll help for him being a potential love interest next book as you can't possible date someone shorter than you. Billy, Jacob's dad, wants him to deliver a message to Bella. Long and short of it Billy wants her to break up with Edward, (he didn't believe that Bella fell in Phoenix-at least someone has sense)and that to warn her that, "We'll be watching". Bella laughs it off as Billy meaning well. The dance ends. Edward cuts back in.
Edward is mad, not at Billy for saying those things, but at Jacob, for two reasons. One: He made Edward break his promise of not letting go of her all night. (Does that mean he'll go into the bathroom with her if she needs to wee?) and two: he called Bella pretty instead of beautiful. Um... right. Odd reasons to get irritated at a person. But I think it's mostly because Jacob showed an interest in Bella who is Edward's. He really needs to get her a dog collar for that.
Edward takes her outside, it's twilight. GASP SIGNIFICANCE saying "Twilight, again," he murmured. "Another ending. No matter how perfect the day is, it always has to end." He brought Bella to the Prom so that she could have a life experience. Bella says that it would only be a parallel dimension of her going to a prom. The reason why she went is because Edward took her. Bella wishes there was some way to explain to how very uninterested I was in a normal human life.
That is not healthy. She has completely given up her life just so that she can be with him. She will do anything to be with him. Again, I bring up that point that if Edward asked her to kill someone or he'll leave, she will kill them. This is not romantic. You are supposed to have interests outside of The Guy.
Finally Edward asks Bella what she thought was going to be happening because they were all dressed up. She thought he was going to turn her.
Yes. That's why they got all dressed up. So that he could inject her with a nasty venom that'll cause her great amounts of pain and kill her. Definitely a black tie event. Edward is at least reasonable about this, even if he does kill the twilight metaphor. So ready for this to be the end... for this to be the twilight of your life, though your life has barely started. You're ready to give up everything. Bella merely points out that it's not the ending it's a beginning.
She is suicidal. She has been throwing herself at a man who can kill her, threaten to kill her and is now begging for him to kill her. Sure, she'll come back as a vampire, but there's no way of knowing that she will. Well, we know she will because she's the heroine, but she doesn't. She just wants to die to be with him. This isn't romance, this is a tragedy.
She gives up for now as they both renew their vows of I Love you Forever.
The End.
*Does the happy dance*
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no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 05:57 am (UTC)You know something is awful when I look forward to Brisingr sporking. Paolini is awful as well but this crap was just so boring. And I actually like romance in my stories! I guess the possessiveness got old really fast. Or... eh, the fact there is no plot. ;P
no subject
Date: 2008-11-02 03:31 am (UTC)Romance is fine, this was I dunno. Not romance.
no subject
Date: 2008-11-02 04:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-02 07:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 06:34 am (UTC)At least it's over. Yay!
And you deserve cookies for surviving it.
no subject
Date: 2008-11-02 07:20 pm (UTC)Yes, I do deserve cookies. Much.
no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 07:42 am (UTC)That is not healthy."
What if she wanted to become a monster person based on the concrete benefits of the change?
I'd prefer to be a White Wolf-style mage, but being a Twilight vampire has
nothing butits advantages.I'll have to avoid going out in the moonlight, lest I end up sparkling. I do awesome, I do not do sparkling.
no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 09:16 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-02 07:52 pm (UTC)Well, she'll definitively will be concrete if she changes. =D
I'm assuming you mean White Wolf-style vampire. I like the mages. Twilight vampires... eh... to perfect to be attractive to me. And I don't like feeling like stone.
no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 03:02 pm (UTC)Will he put a tracking device on her? Seriously, he's a vampire, she's a human, this is just begging for domestic violence.
Charlie:You will hae curfews... visiting hours...Edward is bad for you!! I'm a policeman and I think you being beaten to a bloody pulp is suspicious.
SM: Okay, but now you have to like Edward! He's so pretty.
Charlie: *hypnotized* I...love...Edward...I have...no fear of my daughter's life.
Is it me or do the Cullen girls sound slutty in their dresses? I mean, for remaining under wraps, showing that much skin isn't a good idea.
And did you find Jacob swaying with Bella and talking to her sweet?
"""One: He made Edward break his promise of not letting go of her all night. (Does that mean he'll go into the bathroom with her if she needs to wee?) and two: he called Bella pretty instead of beautiful. Um... right. Odd reasons to get irritated at a person. But I think it's mostly because Jacob showed an interest in Bella who is Edward's. ""
Okay...this is beyond sick. She can dance with whoever the hell she wants, that's feminsim, Ms. Meyers.
And again, sweet-to-creepy factor. She's trying to have Edward be cute and say she's more than pretty. But it just sounds possesive. She's beautiful because he says she is.
And this whole taking her to prom against her will? I vote to impeach Charlie for incomptence as a father and police officer.
no subject
Date: 2008-11-02 07:55 pm (UTC)You mean, it hasn't happened already?
Okay...this is beyond sick. She can dance with whoever the hell she wants, that's feminsim, Ms. Meyers.
Nuuu... she CHOOSES to let Edward control her life. Duh.
And the Charlie thing? Utterly ridiculously.
no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 04:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-03 06:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 07:07 pm (UTC)Thank goodness it's over.
no subject
Date: 2008-11-03 06:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 08:26 pm (UTC)That is all.
no subject
Date: 2008-11-03 06:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 09:13 pm (UTC)Oh, and did the story have anything to do with that preface? Y'know, that confusing thing in the front of the book about something stalking her and about to kill her? Cause, I'm confused.
no subject
Date: 2008-11-03 06:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 09:35 pm (UTC)I decided to join the
no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 10:00 pm (UTC)And yeah, the whole thing is like a twisted version of the end of Titanic...
no subject
Date: 2008-11-01 11:18 pm (UTC)Even so, that sounds like a good community. I'm not the sort who tends to give enough of a crap about the badness of a specific book/series to join a community... but this one I might (if I can't read anything there otherwise.) XD
no subject
Date: 2008-11-03 06:30 pm (UTC)It could be romantic if they weren't taking it so literally.
Fangirls so desperate to be like Bella that they dye their hair brown and nickname themselves "Bella." Girls who seek out boys named Edward only for the name. Teenage girls wanting to get pregnant and name their babies after characters (preferably with a father named Edward or Jacob).
Well... I feel dumb now.
Making the hurting stop
Date: 2008-11-01 11:48 pm (UTC)Stardust or Simpsons repeats... yeah, that was a tough choice.
Oh. My. God. It's like the anti-Twilight. It's such an awesome story.
There is a plot.
There are real human emotions.
The hero is NEVER perfect. He might improve, but he's never perfect. And he wins through his wits as much as skill. And he makes mistakes, even.
And the villains are actually credible, villainous, hateful... and fun to watch.
Oh, and there are actions, reactions, consequences...
I must have the book. Srsly.
Re: Making the hurting stop
Date: 2008-11-02 11:42 pm (UTC)*hearts Neil Gaiman*