I CURSE YOU WITH ONLY BAD FICTION TO READ!

[kippurbird]

Some modern day curses. Because God knows we need some.

• May you be stuck behind a little old lady driving with her flicker on while late for a meeting
• May your credit cards max out and you not have the cash to cover it when you are trying to impress someone.
• May a virus eat all your files and may it spread to your friends and family's computers.
  
• May your coverage always get cut out.
• May your teenage daughter use up all your cell phone minutes at the beginning of the month
  
• May your brand new electronic device find its way into the toilet
  
• May your identity be stolen by a over-weight man with an on-line gambling problem.
  
• May you be stuck on the freeway during rush hour with a flat tire and no cell phone connection
  
• May you have to wait many days for the cable guy
• May the cable/satellite TV cut out at the most important part.
• May the line always be busy
• May the ATM eat your Debit Card
• May pigeons poo on your brand new, freshly washed car
• May coffee spill on your keyboard.
• May your laptop drop onto the hard concrete and break into pieces.
  
• May your connection always be slow and freeze up your system when you try to download something.
  
• May your heels break at an inconvenient moment.
  
• May your fashion dog widdle in your lap or purse
• May the clothes that you wear go quickly out of style
• May you no longer be a trend setter
• May you be barred from all the Must Be Seen places and may your rivals be not
• May you lose your promotion to that idiot over there.

Comments

[andy-longwood.livejournal.com]

XD omg.

My favorites:

May coffee spill on your keyboard.
May you be barred from all the Must Be Seen places and may your rivals be not
May you lose your promotion to that idiot over there.

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

^_^

Glad you like!

[authoressarktos.livejournal.com]

I think I coughed up a lung from laughing so hard.

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

Oh dear. Would you like me to fix that for you?

[authoressarktos.livejournal.com]

Nah, I still have one lung left over. That should tide me over for now.

[smurasaki.livejournal.com]

Hee. ^_^

How about: May the lights all be red when you are late to work.

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

That's a good one! =D

[the-norseman.livejournal.com]

May porn adware highjack your computer when your boss enters your office.

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

*snerks* Good one.