I really need to remember my meds.
Nov. 11th, 2007 05:31 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kippurbirdIt's five forty in the morning where I am, and I've slept maybe an hour. I forgot to take my anti-manic meds. Anyway, my mind tends to buzz horribly when I'm like this (perfectly reasonable hence the whole you know manic shit) bouncing around the stories I read from the hundred dollars worth of comic books I bought yesterday. And drifting over my novel. Of course.
Again, originally, I had planned for Jono to be a complete and utter evil dickwad from dickwad hell. But he's not.
Originally, also, I had planned for Jono to die and Alec to fall in love with a dragon named Verra Rose.
But the way the story is shaping up? It doesn't look like Jono's going to die at all. And that he and Verra's character purposes and stuff are merging into one. Jono's become the person I needed to use Verra for. And since that's happened, I don't need Verra any more.
Which may explain why I had such a hard time writing about the two of them getting married.
Of course, when I created Verra, I was still in my... for lack of a better word, naive stage. Being autistic and all helped with this. But I just didn't realize or well... homosexuality just didn't exist in my world. Honestly, I didn't know about it. It wasn't that my parents kept me sheltered or anything. I just... it didn't happen to intrude in my world and so it didn't exist. And so, of course, Alec got married to a girl.
Once I found out about it, through slash no less (yay the internet is for p0rn) the Alec and Lorac bit sort of fell together. Mostly because I had been trying to keep them straight and well, they weren't.
And Alec just felt - just worked better - in relationships with men.
My future critics are going to have a field day with this. They're going be using my gender identity disorder to explain why Alec ended up a gay man after trying to be a straight traditional man. There'll be talk about gender roles. I just know it.
Anyway, these are just my thoughts. I hope to use Verra somewhere else, because I like her. She's a dragon with a Martha Stewart complex. How can you not like that?
Again, originally, I had planned for Jono to be a complete and utter evil dickwad from dickwad hell. But he's not.
Originally, also, I had planned for Jono to die and Alec to fall in love with a dragon named Verra Rose.
But the way the story is shaping up? It doesn't look like Jono's going to die at all. And that he and Verra's character purposes and stuff are merging into one. Jono's become the person I needed to use Verra for. And since that's happened, I don't need Verra any more.
Which may explain why I had such a hard time writing about the two of them getting married.
Of course, when I created Verra, I was still in my... for lack of a better word, naive stage. Being autistic and all helped with this. But I just didn't realize or well... homosexuality just didn't exist in my world. Honestly, I didn't know about it. It wasn't that my parents kept me sheltered or anything. I just... it didn't happen to intrude in my world and so it didn't exist. And so, of course, Alec got married to a girl.
Once I found out about it, through slash no less (yay the internet is for p0rn) the Alec and Lorac bit sort of fell together. Mostly because I had been trying to keep them straight and well, they weren't.
And Alec just felt - just worked better - in relationships with men.
My future critics are going to have a field day with this. They're going be using my gender identity disorder to explain why Alec ended up a gay man after trying to be a straight traditional man. There'll be talk about gender roles. I just know it.
Anyway, these are just my thoughts. I hope to use Verra somewhere else, because I like her. She's a dragon with a Martha Stewart complex. How can you not like that?
