Not a happy fun post.

I'm dead.

None of my characters are talking to me. Not even Alec, and he always talks to me. I can't get any sort of mental togetherness to write. It's like the whatever it is that you need to be insanely creative has just utterly left me. It's scary and quiet in my head. None of the stories that usually are spinning around in my head are there. It's utterly dead.

The spark is gone.

Work and the sudden rug pulling of the apartment appear to have depressed me beyond measure. Work has been getting to me for a while now. I've had two anxiety attacks that have nearly driven me under the desk. And today is feeling like another hiding day. The work environment is really bad.

Our boss is often times unfindable and the staff right underneath him seem to enjoy complaining about him and their work. It makes it really tense in the office because I can over hear people doing this sort of talking like things. It also doesn't help when Harvey is making his personal phone calls at the top of his voice. I just don't want to be here any more. I can't think. I can't write. And I just... don't have the whatever to do. I just sit here like a lump in a chair.

Getting out of bed is increasingly difficult. Going to sleep is as well. It feels like I've lost my center and I'm wobbling off balance. I just want to hide until it all goes away.

I left a message to see my meds shrink and I'm seeing my other shrink on Friday, so hopefully things will get better. But right now...

I'm dead.

Why no, I'm not working, why do you ask?

Mostly because I'm a freak and way blown tired out of mine I took the Mary Sue test for Kent (the profiler) Harbringer and Alec.

Kent scored a 69 which is 50+
Kill it dead. Or make sure you read the instructions properly (some people don't do this, which causes freakishly high scores) and take the test again.

Alec scored a 42 36+
Fanfiction authors, you might just want to start over. Role-players and original fiction authors, at this point your characters are likely to provoke eye-rolling and exclaimations of "yeah, right!" from your readers. (Well, at least from me.) Immediate workover is probably in order.

Eragon, while I'm at it, scored a 124. Whooo... wow.


Random: Apparently, according to Miss F. Gary (from the Evil Overlord's story) motivation being Money wasn't good enough. He should have some other, deeper motivation beyond wanting money. Gary says that he likes the money and is okay with being shallow like that.

(no subject)

Tonight's line is brought to you by Lost.

"No John, we don't have a code for there's a man in the closet holding my daughter hostage, but clearly we should have one."