the spirit bear doesn't touch me.
Jul. 19th, 2007 11:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kippurbirdObviously since Cole couldn't have survived the night with his injuries, he must be a zombie.
As Cole lies in pain, in the rain, he starts angsting... no wait he continues angsting. Nobody cares about him. Why should he care about himself. Blah blah blah.
And then he sees a sparrow. It's a mommy sparrow. And mommy sparrow is feeding her little baby sparrows. Cole sees them and he hates them. He thinks they should die because that's what they deserve. He thinks momma sparrow should leave them to fend for themselves because she didn't owe them anything.
Cole feels the same way not owing anyone anything because no one cared for him. It rains. Nothing is his fault. He's in pain. He's angry. It's raining. He's lonely. I don't care. I wish he'd die already... or eat some brains. He doesn't freeze to death in the storm. Instead he pulls the imaginary blanket over him and falls asleep. It storms. He wakes up. He sees the bear again. The bear vanishes. There's not much action. Cole hates the bear.
It rains some more. A tree explodes. Cole cries. "Never in his life had he felt so exposed, so vulnerable, so helpless. He had no control. To this storm, he was an insignificant as a leaf. Cole blinked in stunned realization. He had always been this weak. How could he have ever thought he truly controlled anything?"
The storm blows out. He feels weak (but still not dead) and wonders which way he should go, fight to stay alive or just die. And then he sees the moon and starts thinking about what Garvey and Edwin told him about circles.
Then out of nowhere, he remembers the baby birds and the fact that the tree that they were in exploded. And what does he think? Not Good the baby birds are dead, but where are they? And he calls out, asking if they're okay.
Now, the question is, where did that come from? Where in this entire chapter did Cole go from HATEHATEHATE to where's the baby birds? Yes, he realized that he's absolutely nothing. Though why it takes the storm, instead of the bear beating the crap out of him to realize this, I don't know. I mean at least the bear thinks while the storm is just a force of nature. And the bear did nearly maul him to death, while the storm just... rained. Obviously, he was supposed to have an epiphany somewhere... but I must have missed it between the rain and the pain... and the rain. There is nothing in this chapter that indicates that he has found some reason to care about the birds. He goes from hate to are they okay with in... hours. With no thought process in between comparing himself and his situation to the birds.
It just happens.
And he's still not dead.
As Cole lies in pain, in the rain, he starts angsting... no wait he continues angsting. Nobody cares about him. Why should he care about himself. Blah blah blah.
And then he sees a sparrow. It's a mommy sparrow. And mommy sparrow is feeding her little baby sparrows. Cole sees them and he hates them. He thinks they should die because that's what they deserve. He thinks momma sparrow should leave them to fend for themselves because she didn't owe them anything.
Cole feels the same way not owing anyone anything because no one cared for him. It rains. Nothing is his fault. He's in pain. He's angry. It's raining. He's lonely. I don't care. I wish he'd die already... or eat some brains. He doesn't freeze to death in the storm. Instead he pulls the imaginary blanket over him and falls asleep. It storms. He wakes up. He sees the bear again. The bear vanishes. There's not much action. Cole hates the bear.
It rains some more. A tree explodes. Cole cries. "Never in his life had he felt so exposed, so vulnerable, so helpless. He had no control. To this storm, he was an insignificant as a leaf. Cole blinked in stunned realization. He had always been this weak. How could he have ever thought he truly controlled anything?"
The storm blows out. He feels weak (but still not dead) and wonders which way he should go, fight to stay alive or just die. And then he sees the moon and starts thinking about what Garvey and Edwin told him about circles.
Then out of nowhere, he remembers the baby birds and the fact that the tree that they were in exploded. And what does he think? Not Good the baby birds are dead, but where are they? And he calls out, asking if they're okay.
Now, the question is, where did that come from? Where in this entire chapter did Cole go from HATEHATEHATE to where's the baby birds? Yes, he realized that he's absolutely nothing. Though why it takes the storm, instead of the bear beating the crap out of him to realize this, I don't know. I mean at least the bear thinks while the storm is just a force of nature. And the bear did nearly maul him to death, while the storm just... rained. Obviously, he was supposed to have an epiphany somewhere... but I must have missed it between the rain and the pain... and the rain. There is nothing in this chapter that indicates that he has found some reason to care about the birds. He goes from hate to are they okay with in... hours. With no thought process in between comparing himself and his situation to the birds.
It just happens.
And he's still not dead.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 06:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 06:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 06:46 am (UTC)He sees the bear again. The bear vanishes. There's not much action. Cole hates the bear.
Lolz. What, I ask, this boy doesn´t hate?
And the bird thing... *facepalm* I can see what the author tried to do, I really can. But you have to be good to write anger/denial and epiphany and a change of course, and he´s not good enough. He should have just explained everything like he did with in the first chapter. It would be boring as hell, but at least his character woudn´t sound crazy.
Well.
More crazy, anyway.
no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 06:55 pm (UTC)Can't you? But the way it's presented here, it doesn't make a diddlesqueat of sense. It needed to be a more gradual thing, if anything. Not just dropped on us.
no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 10:30 am (UTC)A ready-made fire and pre-cooked chicken! And we're supposed to believe he wufs teh widdel bir-dees. Makes me wanna watch a PETA ad while snacking on McNuggets.
no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 06:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 01:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 06:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 11:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 01:15 pm (UTC)Maybe he's wondering if the baby birds are dead so he can eat them. That seems more logical, given his condition.
no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 07:00 pm (UTC)Yes. But he calls out, "Are you okay" which seems to negate that idea.
no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 01:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 07:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-20 08:52 pm (UTC)Erm... because the baby birds will answer him? They're birds. And even if they were humans with the power of speech, they're babies.
I suppose I shouldn't be so hard on him; I mean, really, he should be so deep in shock that he's basically blasted out of his gourd. But gorramit, if the writer can't be bothered to take basic human physiology into account, I won't either!
no subject
Date: 2007-07-23 01:24 am (UTC)No, you see, all of a sudden he's had an epiphany where he's learned to care about all living things and they're important. It has nothing to do with the birds being able to answer him.
Why should you be easy on him? He's a complete and utter jerk who hasn't done anything to earn our sympathy?
no subject
Date: 2007-07-21 03:35 am (UTC)I mean, come on! My sister when she was nine knew better then to just go:
HatehatehatehatehateREVILATION!love, kindness and the "whatever country he's from" way!
no subject
Date: 2007-07-23 01:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-23 12:21 am (UTC)Wait...what? Why is the tree exploding?
no subject
Date: 2007-07-23 01:26 am (UTC)