Q-Squared part 1
May. 9th, 2007 11:17 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kippurbirdSo, I begin with Q-Squared, by Peter David. For some of you, you may be wondering why I've chosen to do this book, instead of others that have recommended or even that aren't so... fandom specific. Peter David writes fan fiction. Fan fiction that's good and well written. This is to compare to Eragon and Eldest which was fan fiction that wasn't really well written. David manages to pull of things that Paolini wishes he could have.
Since this is a very specific universe, I'll be linking to things that are fandom specific, like character names and things like that to help you along.
Summary
We begin with an adult and a child. The child asks what are they going to do today, and the adult who believes that the child is full of potential says that there "Is nothing that they are not going to today" (page 1) The boy decides that he wants to understand everything. The adult wants to know what he means by "everything", the boy says "everything as in everything." When the boy wants to know what they shall do when they understand everything, the adult declares, "Die, most likely." This is our introductory scene, letting us know about the powers at work. The two individuals are capable creating stars, reshape cosmoses. The forces at work -that will be at work - are of galactic proportions. It is an everything can and will go story.
Track A chapter one.
One of the more famous lines in the Next Generation episodes is "Jean-Luc... there's something I've been wanting to tell you." It is spoken by Beverly Crusher, the chief medical officer on the Star Ship Enterprise. She is an old friend of Captain Picard, captain of the Enterprise. Dr. Crusher has never been able to say what it is that she wanted to tell him in the series. David begins his book with this line. By starting the book with this line, it allows the reader to believe that they're in comfortable and familiar territory. Not only that but for readers who know the history of this line, they get a little, "ah-ha". But if they don't know they history, they don't lose anything. Picard puts down a book of Shakespeare sonnets, telling us what sort of man he is, educated and cultured. And the sort that reads paper books in a paperless future.
As the text is produced, Picard's rank is never given and Crusher's gender is not said. It could be said that this is done because the reader already knows this. Crusher apparently is uncomfortable about a woman coming aboard the ship. A former lover. Which immediately draws the reader's attention to the fact that something might be wrong. Though it is perfectly acceptable for us to believe that Crusher is having a relationship with a woman, but most fans would know that this isn't likely. Picard tries to guess who it is, going through several names, finally settling on "Beverly".
And here is our big twist. The person who is speaking to Picard is not Beverly Crusher as previously expected, but instead her long dead husband, Jack. This is similar to the twist that Paolini tried to throw at the readers when he said that Murtagh and the Twins were gone, but not dead. No where did David say that Crusher wasn't Beverly, but instead he lets the reader assume it. Paolini lets the reader assume it as well, but he then doesn't bring it up ever again. He allows the reader to forget about it, and then when he brings Murtagh back it's supposed to be a big surprise and twist, but instead it's more of a where did this come from and why is this even here? There was no reason for us to believe that Murtagh was dead. By letting us believe that the reader feels cheated. The same emotional drama, in fact even more emotional drama could have been had if Eragon believed that Murtagh had been captured as he wondered what sort of torment Murtagh had been going through. In David's case, it allows us to realize that, no we're not in the universe we thought we were. To help us realize that we're not in our regular universe, David takes us into Picard's thoughts where he says, "One did not, after all, become the first officer on the Fleet's flagship without making a habit of proceeding with caution." (page 6). Here we learn that Picard is not the captain, like we thought. Here in this universe something happened to allow Jack Crusher to live and Picard to get demoted in rank.
Picard and Crusher talk about Beverly, who has apparently divorced her husband and returned to her maiden name of "Howard", and how she's going to be the Chief Medical Officer on the Enterprise. Though it is uncomfortable for the captain, he only wants the best for his crew, and Beverly is the best. In an effort to ease relations between him and his ex, Crusher asks Picard to run interference between her and him on day to day matters.
So, what do you think? Should I continue?
Since this is a very specific universe, I'll be linking to things that are fandom specific, like character names and things like that to help you along.
Summary
We begin with an adult and a child. The child asks what are they going to do today, and the adult who believes that the child is full of potential says that there "Is nothing that they are not going to today" (page 1) The boy decides that he wants to understand everything. The adult wants to know what he means by "everything", the boy says "everything as in everything." When the boy wants to know what they shall do when they understand everything, the adult declares, "Die, most likely." This is our introductory scene, letting us know about the powers at work. The two individuals are capable creating stars, reshape cosmoses. The forces at work -that will be at work - are of galactic proportions. It is an everything can and will go story.
Track A chapter one.
One of the more famous lines in the Next Generation episodes is "Jean-Luc... there's something I've been wanting to tell you." It is spoken by Beverly Crusher, the chief medical officer on the Star Ship Enterprise. She is an old friend of Captain Picard, captain of the Enterprise. Dr. Crusher has never been able to say what it is that she wanted to tell him in the series. David begins his book with this line. By starting the book with this line, it allows the reader to believe that they're in comfortable and familiar territory. Not only that but for readers who know the history of this line, they get a little, "ah-ha". But if they don't know they history, they don't lose anything. Picard puts down a book of Shakespeare sonnets, telling us what sort of man he is, educated and cultured. And the sort that reads paper books in a paperless future.
As the text is produced, Picard's rank is never given and Crusher's gender is not said. It could be said that this is done because the reader already knows this. Crusher apparently is uncomfortable about a woman coming aboard the ship. A former lover. Which immediately draws the reader's attention to the fact that something might be wrong. Though it is perfectly acceptable for us to believe that Crusher is having a relationship with a woman, but most fans would know that this isn't likely. Picard tries to guess who it is, going through several names, finally settling on "Beverly".
And here is our big twist. The person who is speaking to Picard is not Beverly Crusher as previously expected, but instead her long dead husband, Jack. This is similar to the twist that Paolini tried to throw at the readers when he said that Murtagh and the Twins were gone, but not dead. No where did David say that Crusher wasn't Beverly, but instead he lets the reader assume it. Paolini lets the reader assume it as well, but he then doesn't bring it up ever again. He allows the reader to forget about it, and then when he brings Murtagh back it's supposed to be a big surprise and twist, but instead it's more of a where did this come from and why is this even here? There was no reason for us to believe that Murtagh was dead. By letting us believe that the reader feels cheated. The same emotional drama, in fact even more emotional drama could have been had if Eragon believed that Murtagh had been captured as he wondered what sort of torment Murtagh had been going through. In David's case, it allows us to realize that, no we're not in the universe we thought we were. To help us realize that we're not in our regular universe, David takes us into Picard's thoughts where he says, "One did not, after all, become the first officer on the Fleet's flagship without making a habit of proceeding with caution." (page 6). Here we learn that Picard is not the captain, like we thought. Here in this universe something happened to allow Jack Crusher to live and Picard to get demoted in rank.
Picard and Crusher talk about Beverly, who has apparently divorced her husband and returned to her maiden name of "Howard", and how she's going to be the Chief Medical Officer on the Enterprise. Though it is uncomfortable for the captain, he only wants the best for his crew, and Beverly is the best. In an effort to ease relations between him and his ex, Crusher asks Picard to run interference between her and him on day to day matters.
So, what do you think? Should I continue?
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-05-10 12:43 pm (UTC)I don't see why not. Trek definitely isn't my cup of tea* -- Justin B Rye has a whole section of his site (sub-site?) explaining why -- but it's familiar enough for illustrative purposes. Let's see how David makes this work.
*(...though I'm willing to try Earl Grey.)
no subject
Date: 2007-05-10 06:12 pm (UTC)(Earl Grey is very nice, but you need to add milk to it.)
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Date: 2007-05-10 05:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-10 05:32 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2007-05-10 06:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-10 06:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-10 06:26 pm (UTC)I read about half of the book in the book store before I was finally able to afford it. I would go to the sci-fi section and read it bits at a time.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-10 06:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-10 06:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-10 05:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-10 06:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-10 11:42 pm (UTC)Indeed, anyone who remembers the ending of The Host knows that it is, in fact, rather more than 'less likely'. For the true Trek fan, hearing 'Crusher' worry about an ex-lover of the female persuasion immediately starts one wondering just what kind of alternate universe we've wandered into. Does Picard, for instance, have a goatee?
And yeah, go for it. Q-Squared is one of the best TNG books I ever read, and not only is it one of Q's best outings, but it links the proto-Q from TOS with the Continuum itself, which is all kinds of fannishly awesome.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-12 06:19 pm (UTC)Did that make sense?
no subject
Date: 2007-05-12 08:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-19 08:07 pm (UTC)1) Starting a book with dialog. Ie. "Jean-Luc... there's something I've been wanting to tell you." I assume this is the very first line of the book? If so, it is called a "hook" and tries to ensnare the reader by shocking them. Books should never start with spoken dialog since the reader has no idea who is saying it, what the setting is, the gender or identity of the speaker etc. It's just a cheap attempt to grab the reader's attention. It's like writing "Hey! Look out!" as the first line. Who's saying it? Where are they? What's going on? Who knows? It generates artificial tension.
2) Withheld information. This is another common mistake made by juvenile writers. The book goes on for paragraphs before the identity of the speakers are revealed. More importantly it tries to play the cute little trick of "Hey look! It is CRUSHER! But not the one you thought! Haha! Fooled you!" Well of course you fucking fooled me! I never had a chance to know otherwise since you haven't told me a goddamn thing about the characters! If I had been in the room, I would have known instantly that it was Jack not Beverly. But instead the author artificially engineered tension by NOT TELLING US THE GLARINGLY OBVIOUS!!!
Two huge mistakes. Dump that shit.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-20 12:36 am (UTC)1)There's nothing wrong with using a quote as a first line. After all the point of the first line is to draw in the reader and hook them. If it makes you want to read on, then it has successfully fulfilled its purpose. The writer wants the reader to ask such questions.
2) Things were told about the characters, in Picard's reactions to Crusher. Things that if you were careful you could pick things up. And once Crusher started talking about his relationships with women, the buzzer would have gone up. The entire point of this section was to let you know that your expectations were wrong and you're somewhere totally new.
Both things were cleverly handled as to compel the reader to go forward, to try and figure out what was going on. You forget that this is really a sort of Star Trek fan fiction. And the reader is going to be knowing certain things that a none Star Trek fan doesn't know, like the fact that it is Crusher who always says that line to Picard. It is geared to a very specific reader. Which is a problem with doing this book, but I'm hoping to eliminate it by careful explanations.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-20 10:54 pm (UTC)2) "The entire point of this section was to let you know that your expectations were wrong and you're somewhere totally new."
Wrong again. It's just a cute trick. It's like writing a story about the original series and then revealing that after nearly a page, the character you thought was McCoy was actually a different person named "Bones." It's just a bogus, cheap way of luring a reader and making yourself seem clever.
Also, just because it is a "fan-fiction" does not mean it's okay to play cute little tricks that any talentless hack can. The book sucks already and it's been less than a page. If you're looking for something good to read, try getting a book that doesn't rely on confusing prose, cheap tricks, roundabout storytelling and brainless "hooks." Try getting a novel by someone competent who doesn't play games, but just writes in a direct, meaningful fashion.