... Because...?

[kippurbird]

Part Four

So, Max, without tearing her clothes, manages to unfold her wings. So, either she wasn’t wearing a shirt this entire time or her wings are some of that magical wings that are often shown in comic books that just magically appear through a shirt.

Once again we’re told that yes, they really did live in a place call the School and that avian DNA was grafted onto them. Okay, I did a bit of research, having remembered the thing of glow in the dark mice. Here. if you want to see. The thing that it says is that the DNA is injected into the mice embryos and then they glowed in the dark. So, grafting the DNA in the … am I getting to caught up in the scientific details here?

Ah. Anyway.

Jeb had been one of the scientists and he kidnapped them all from the School because he felt sorry for them.

And now the Erasers *sniggers* had six-year-old Angel.

I say “six-year-old Angel” because that’s what the text says. We’re told, once again, that she’s six years old. Because we need to know that bit of information again. For some reason. It’s not like knowing it again helps improve the story in anyway, shape or form. Is it supposed to be more horrid that she’s been kidnapped since she’s six? Or is it supposed to … you know, I have no answer to it. It’s not relevant to her character or her situation. The fact that she’s kidnapped should be relevant enough to making us fear for her.

So the five of them fly after the humvee, Iggy, the blind one with them all right. And with their at least thirteen feet wing span they’re flying through trees. And Fang decides to whack the car with a stick he manages to “snatch a dead branch off a tree” which seems to indicate to me that he has to break it off. Which I think would be hard to do while flying. And he gets shot at, but not hit.
at point blank range.

Oh! And there’s a helicopter! How did they miss that? I mean... it’s a helicopter. They’re large and make noise.

Max thinks that the best shot they have at retrieving Angel is when they take her from the car to the chopper. As opposed to taking down the car before it gets to the chopper. But, that would be logical. A grenade is thrown and Nudge and Iggy avoid getting blown up. I am sad. Fang however has gotten hurt. Somehow. All we’re told is that he drops on some Eraserhead and then drops back as he’s bleeding from his arm. But, how he was injured, we don’t know.

We’re then told, as he does so, that Ari is incredibly athletic as he jumps through the helicopter door after tossing Angel through the door. Because him jumping through the door in the helicopter taking off doesn’t show him being athletic.

Max grabs a hold of a landing skid and Ari picks up a rifle to shoot it at Max. As he does so he says, “Let me tell you a secret, old pal, old chap,” Ari yelled at me.”You’ve got it all wrong. We’re the good guys!”

First. Who talks like that? Old chap? That’s something you hear Supposedly British People say in period pieces. This is not a period British piece. The character speaking it is of undetermined age but we’re going to go at most in his teens and he’s on a helicopter with a rifle.

Second. “We’re the good guys”? Why did he even say this? Max hasn’t said anything to him. Pleaded with him to come with her, to let them go. It’s like there’s a missing scene there. Something got cut out. Max should have pleaded with him to come with them, let Angel go, blah blah blah. Something that should have cued him saying that he’s the good guy.

It’s as if there are scenes missing and no one noticed. If LKH’s editor is a goldfish in a bowl, then Patterson’s is a five year old kid with scissors and tape.

Max drops off the helicopter and angsts about her baby flying to her death and things worse than death. But she says to death and then worse than death. Which can’t happen if she’s already dead. It should have been the other way around.

We're told they all have raptor vision (except Iggy, well, we're not told that) and so they can watch the helicopter fly away much longer than normal folks.

There is angst about this. She cries and beats a tree trying to figure out what to do. And she cries. And it’s horrible. And I don’t care.

And Ari’s words ‘we’re the good guys’ are still in her head. Why?

I have no idea.

Comments

[jacedraccus.livejournal.com]

My personal theory is that there used to be a particular song that played a lot in the School, but they could never make out all the words.

So Max and Ari would argue about it.

"We're the good guys" is Ari's translation.

[kjtaylor.livejournal.com]

Maybe the "old chap" bit was meant to be a quote or a reference of some kind?

Also, what kind of name is Ari anywh- er, never mind!

[swankivy.livejournal.com]

Hehe, I have fairies with wings in one of my books (normal-sized people, btw) and they wear clothes, and yeah, I had a very good explanation for why that's possible. (And it certainly wasn't some dumb excuse just so they could wear clothes, either, 'cause hey, I have faith that if fairies couldn't wear ordinary clothes, they could have developed fashions that worked around the whole having wings thing. Hello!)

[blackfeather93.livejournal.com]

We have a horse named Ari. And our Princess's husband is named Ari too =P

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

Ari is a perfectly acceptable name for a nice Jewish boy. :P

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

Yes, but you're intelligent.

[swankivy.livejournal.com]

Yeah, really, I'm saying it's not that damn hard to make reality actually make sense, even if you're writing science fiction or fantasy. It really annoys me when people overlook the most basic of practical details when they do things like write about people with wings for God's sake.

Out of curiosity I Googled Maximum Ride after reading your post and I found a Wiki article of some kind where the person who wrote it was trying to post manga versions of the characters and referred to one of Nudge as "the mange version of Mudge." Yes, just typos, but I had to laugh at "mange version." LOL.

WTF?!

[dove-cg.livejournal.com]

We're told they all have raptor vision (except Iggy, well, we're not told that) and so they can watch the helicopter fly away much longer than normal folks.

*bangs head into table* THEY HAVE WINGS! HELICOPTERS AREN'T BUILT FOR EXTREME SPEED, THEY'RE BUILT FOR EASE OF TRANSPORTATION OF CARGO. These stupid kids were able to catch up to a CAR! Yes, it stopped, but they were close enough to HIT IT WITH A TREE BRANCH WHILE IN PURSUIT! ARRRRGGGH! FOR GOODNESS SAKE, MAX WAS HANGING ONTO THE HELICTOPER AND JUST LET GO?! SHE COULD HAVE CONTINUED FIGHTING AND NOT WORRIED ABOUT FALLING OFF OR CRASHING THE HELICOPTER BECAUSE SHE CAN FLY! AND SO CAN ANGEL! SO WHAT IF HE HAS A GUN? HE ISN'T GOING TO KILL HER BECAUSE CLEARLY THEY WANT THE KIDS ALIVE!

*finally calms down and twitches* Sorry, that was just my first reaction after reaching that point. It's all pure Idiot Ball stuff. }:@

She cries and beats a tree trying to figure out what to do.

Hey, hey! That poor tree did nothing to you! Keep your super-strong hands off of it.

Max grabs a hold of a landing skid and Ari picks up a rifle to shoot it at Max. As he does so he says, “Let me tell you a secret, old pal, old chap,” Ari yelled at me.”You’ve got it all wrong. We’re the good guys!”

I am now envisioning a seven-to-ten year old wearing a monocle and bowler derby while wielding a gun as big as he is. It has amused me enough to calm me down a little more. But honestly, WHY is he using a gun? What purpose does that serve? Wasn't the point of being part wolf to give them fighting prowess? Also, I see Patterson is trying to make Max question her morality. But this doesn't work because a) we haven't seen enough of Max doing anything to even have a true prior gauge on her morality and b) we haven't seen enough of Ari doing anything to get a true gauge of his morality. The suggestion of greyness instead of a black-and-white POV only works if both Ari and Max have done something ambiguous which, as it has been presented here, would suggest being beaten up by an ambush and then chasing after the ambushers who took your little sister is ambiguous. Yes, I suppose Patterson is trying to suggest that the School isn't so bad and Ari enjoys being a part of it. But not having seen the School proper the readers can't make their own assessment, which is what ambiguity is supposed to achieve.

This is more than missing Max's pleading. This is missing Max and Ari's entire fucking past. Which, well, I suppose the pleading would have achieved. She could have mentioned the good times, what she saw as wrong, and why Ari should change sides. Instead, all we have is the author trying to tell us that Ari believes he is in the right, which is why he does what he does, without even showing us what Ari actually believes in.

Of COURSE Ari doesn't think he's a villain! Most people don't! It's human nature to presume we are in the right, until proven otherwise. The only reason Patterson is doing this is because he saw how paper-thin his cardboard cut-outs were and he knew he needed to pump some life into them but he only wanted to exert minimal effort in doing so. Which is why we get this kind of crap in the first place. I can forgive Paolini for not understanding the horrible implications he has made. I can't forgive Patterson (or Paolini, because he does this more so in the later books) for seeing the problem, actually acknowledging it in the text, and then doing the bare minimum to resolve said problem because otherwise they'd have to reconsider how they've handled the plot so far. :(

[dove-cg.livejournal.com]

Yeah, really, I'm saying it's not that damn hard to make reality actually make sense, even if you're writing science fiction or fantasy. It really annoys me when people overlook the most basic of practical details when they do things like write about people with wings for God's sake.

Agreed. You know what I think the easiest way to get around that is, in a semi-modern setting? It might not be comfortable but it's easy enough to just wear a button-up/button-down shirt backwards and leave it unbuttoned or only button the top and bottom buttons. Voila. Or really, anything that buttons in the back naturally would work fine. Or even just a shirt that is built like a standard non-sports bra. Simple. A little awkward, possibly, to get on but if you have people living with you, who you're comfortable with buttoning/zipping you up, then you're golden. And this with the idea that the wings can't be magically turned off and on but have to constantly be accounted for. :P

Oh! Or for that matter, something like a Sari would work perfectly. Might fall off easily if you're flying and don't have it on tight enough but... it would work fine.

Re: WTF?!

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

She let go because she was sure Ari would shoot her. And then who would rescue Angel? Also, if the kids fly after the helicopter and rescue Angel, where is the plot for the rest of the book?

He's using a gun because he's in a helicopter that's flying. I don't know.

We don't know what anyone believes in, really. Or their thoughts. Or anything about them. A lot of this feels like "Oh you should feel sorry for us because we've been made experiments by mad scientists."

[kjtaylor.livejournal.com]

Actually I think Ari is a perfectly good name; I just thought it would be funny to say that after what you told me. ^_^

Re: WTF?!

[kjtaylor.livejournal.com]

You have to build up to emotional scenes, sometimes over the course of an entire book. You can't just pull them out of your arse and expect them to work.

Re: WTF?!

[dove-cg.livejournal.com]

Agreed. How can you care when you don't even know the characters or what they've been through? It's like trying to care for a random person in a car accident which you can't see very well as you're driving by. You feel for the driver and anyone else in the car with them, if only because you understand suffering, but you can only feel so much if you don't know them personally and you can't even tell how bad the accident was. :\

Re: WTF?!

[dove-cg.livejournal.com]

We don't know what anyone believes in, really. Or their thoughts. Or anything about them. A lot of this feels like "Oh you should feel sorry for us because we've been made experiments by mad scientists."

That's just sad when it's first person narration. You'd THINK first person would let you know all about Max, if nothing else. But no.

I'm still working under the theory that the school treated them well but not as if they were human. And not because of Ari's statement. Just because nothing about the school has really been divulged so far.

You know, this reminds me... I cried when Nina and Alexander died, in at least two of the three versions of Fullmetal Alchemist (can't recall exactly how I responded to the first anime; the second anime and the manga I've seen more recently so I remember it distinctly.) And they appeared for a very short amount of time in all incarnations. :|

[jacedraccus.livejournal.com]

The webcomic Kevin and Kell has, among other furry characters, a porcupine. One of the Sunday comics showed a series of 'cut out' outfits, the kind you use with paper dolls, folding tabs behind the doll to hold the dress in place... except, in this case, these were the porcupine's clothes, designed to wrap around her front and pin to her quills.

As for the wings, there's all sorts of shirts and tops that cover the midriff and chest to varying degrees but leave the back open, fastening or tying behind the neck.

Re: WTF?!

[kjtaylor.livejournal.com]

Ooh, good analogy!

[swankivy.livejournal.com]

There are a lot of clothes that actually have a completely open back (especially here in Florida where I live, heh). You could easily just wear something like that as your main garment, and wrap a shawl around you for extra warmth if needed. I also have a character in a short story who has wings that require her to alter her clothes, and what she basically does is cut a couple slits in the clothes, hem the holes, and attach velcro along the bottoms of the slits so they are easily fastenable. Though she's kind of a weird case because for most of the story she has wings that aren't big enough to fly with (and is kind of pissed off about that), then later she figures out she can magically change their size, including making them big enough to fly with and small enough to be, well, nonexistent so she can wear normal clothes. :) (Before she learned to do that, though, it was a problem.)

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

Hah.

[dove-cg.livejournal.com]

You know, I read that webcomic but I must have missed that one. Or else I just don't remember it. (It has been around a long time.) Either way, cute idea. :)

And true! I knew there were many that left the back open but I forgot how many fastened at the neck. The thing is, if they have wings all the time, they can't really push any part of it over their head so anything that only partially fastens is a no-go. But there are many designs for shirts, especially for women, and there are a lot that should already be tailored surprisingly well for that kind of obstacle.

[dove-cg.livejournal.com]

Er, any part of it over their head = any part over the wings, at least not easily (if they're big.) Smaller ones maybe but it really depends on how delicate the wings are.

[dove-cg.livejournal.com]

That idea for the clothing is interesting (and less lazy than my ideas) but how did she fasten the velcro? I guess practice with blindly fumbling around her back?

But yeah, at least you went through the process of her learning about all that and that it did have its problems. Oh, you know! That reminds me of the time I wore some fake faerie wings in a Renaissance Fair. It was fine until I went into some of the tents and buildings or if there was a crowd. Then I kept bumping them into people. Lucky thing she figured out how to make them disappear when she figured out how to make them larger. XD

Re: WTF?!

[dove-cg.livejournal.com]

Why thank you! Sometimes I have good ones. :3

[swankivy.livejournal.com]

It's not tough to fasten Velcro in the back (as long as it doesn't go up to a place where you can't reach). Mostly the Velcro just goes up to the place where the wings come out, so it's easy to reach and just sticking it together fastens it 'cause Velcro's awesome that way. The real pain in the butt is having to hem those holes. Booo.

The fairy I'm talking about had a rather weird life and didn't know anybody else like herself, so it takes her a long time to figure out what she's able to do. And some physical constants seem to apply to her while others don't--like she has to sleep, but she doesn't have to eat. I have no idea why. (The story's not told from her point of view. It's told from the point of view of a guy who may or may not be in love with her.)

[jacedraccus.livejournal.com]

Well, actually, I should have been a bit clearer with that. What I specifically had in mind was something that either:

A) is stepped into and pulled up the body, then fastens behind the neck, or
B) wrapped around the middle and fastened in front, then turned around to the back, like bras can be.