A unit of kippur

[kippurbird]

What is a unit of kippur?

A kippur is a unit used to measure the awfulness of a book. The more kippurs a book has, the worse it is. While it could be said that there is a scale of kippurs, generally no one has been able to agree on how many kippurs should make up a satisfactory standard scale. After all, new bad books are constantly found and break the old standard. Therefor it is just uniformly agreed that the more kippurs a book has, the further you should stay away from it.

How is a kippur derived?

Using a very precise formula involving the number of pages, the amount of purple prose, the urge to throw the book against the wall, the amount of times 'wtf' is uttered, and use of book as an insomnia cure, the kippur is derived.

Because of the amount of pages is involved in the creation of the kippur unit, a larger book may have more kippurs than a smaller book and yet still be as good. There for it is always important to check the page numbers with the amount of kippurs a book has before making your decision on if a book is good or not. Much like the spiciness of peppers, how many kippurs a person can take is up to the individual reader.

Comments

[albijuli]

But kippur sounds tasty ;-;

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

A kipper is a small fish that should be eaten.

A kippur is not.

[dergerm.livejournal.com]

LOL ^_^ Reading this, I instantly thought of a few things that are downright saturated with kippurs.

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

I'm sure you did! The world is full of kippur saturated things. Which is why the kippur unit was created.

[kjtaylor.livejournal.com]

Ah! I had wondered where your name came from. So you're the bird that measures out the kippurs, eh?

Also, did you send me a copy of Supernatural, season four? Only it turned up in my mailbox yesterday with no note or return address.

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

Actually, unless you're being sarcastic, it comes from the holiday Yom Kippur. Which we named our second parakeet after.

And, no, I didn't. First off, it's the fourth season, I would have started you off with season one. Second I've never seen the show at all. Clearly you either have a mystery fan or a wrong package. XD

[seraphmori.livejournal.com]

This made me giggle like a lunatic. I'm not sure why. I'm not sure why you need to know this either... *wanders off*

[kjtaylor.livejournal.com]

Ah, I see. I really had wondered.

Nobody else has come forward to say they sent it to me, and it does seem odd that someone would give me the fourth rather than the first series. I'm starting to think it was a mistake. Ah well, can't complain.

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

Yes. That also explains the parakeet fixation too. :D

I don't think they'd come forward if it's an anonymous gift, now would they?

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

I thought it was hysterical...